Episode 1 | Trump, Vapes, Unknown Babies, and Aftercare

They say your first podcast episode will be bad, so I decided, why not make it horrendous?

In this episode:

• Trump Supporters in Australia
• Vape Technology
• Mum uses dead son's sperm to have a baby
• Conclusions are Aftercare for essays

Lets Cancel Harry - New episodes every Monday

Chapters

• 0:00 Hi!
• 1:15 Trump Supporters in Australia
• 6:19 Vape Technology
• 8:49 Mum uses Dead Sons Sperm to have a Baby
• 11:16 Conclusions are Aftercare for Essays

Transcript

Harry: 0:00

I have started a podcast. I've joined the bandwagon and... I'm sorry.

Narrator: 0:07

Your're listening to Let's Cancel Harry.

Harry: 0:08

It is right. I have decided to start a podcast. So after all these years of making podcasts for school and doing weird stuff on radio, I have decided to start my own podcast and give myself a voice, which honestly... Don't offer us the smartest idea. And that's why I've given it the name. You've seen the name. It's Let's Cancel Harry. I decided that at the rate I'm going, I'm probably going to get cancelled myself. So I might as well take away the fun from you guys and cancel myself. Because... Some of the stuff I say or think, I just can't say in public, but I'm going to anyway. So this is going to be a place where I can talk about weird news stories or things that are happening or I'm going to have people on that know me a little bit too well. It's going to be a little bit scary when some of those guys come on and just some of the weird thoughts that I have. Like, think of it like a drunken pub chat. This is a drunken pub chat, but I'm going to be sitting speaking at you and it's your choice to listen or not. I mean... That's just what happens at the pub anyway. To start episode one off strong, I thought that there's only one thing to do. Let's talk politics. Let's get political, political. I wanna get political. Let's get political.

ScoMo: 1:28

I did not shit my pants at an Engadine Mecca's in 1997.

Harry: 1:33

Yes, politics in episode one. I decided to get it over and done with. Well, not done. Let's get it started with, I should say. So the other day I was driving and I saw a car with Trump stickers on it. In SA. I'm in Adelaide, Australia. And there was a car covered. The whole back of the car. It was Trump to make SA great again. Trump in SA. Let's do it. Trump. MAGA. And all this stuff. And it was like... It gave me the visceral reaction I see when I see Baby on Board stickers. You know when you see the sticker, like, be careful, Baby on Board. Like, little one on board. For some reason... And I think it's normal. Well, I hope it's normal. Probably not normal. I get the sudden urge to just floor it. And I don't, I haven't yet, but I always just want to drive into the back of the car and see what's going to happen because it's almost like a target. As soon as someone has that on the back of their car, it's like a target. And for me, seeing the Trump stickers was the very same thing. I had the sudden urge to put my foot down on the accelerator and just go at it. And if you're in the car right now and you see someone with Trump stickers on the back of their car, Please do it. Please. I didn't tell you to do it. But if you're going to do it, I gave you the inspiration. And to me, Trump supporters in Australia are like Clive Palmer supporters in America. No one is over there saying, yes, Clive Palmer. Yes, go at him. It's the same thing. If Trump wasn't as big as he is today and causing as much stir... controversy, whatever you want to say, telling people to inject bleach because apparently that's going to cure COVID. Don't do that. It doesn't work. But that same thing is like a Clive Palmer or a Peter Dutton supporter in America. It's just not really making an impact. Yes, what he does slightly affects us, and I see why someone might dislike him, but seeing why someone might like him when he's over in Australia doesn't make sense to me. And Something else that doesn't make sense to me is opening up a Trump themed coffee shop. And someone over in Brisbane has done that. They opened it up during his 2016 term. So what, four years ago now. And when he bought the coffee shop and started it up, he had a loss of customers. So the customer, the coffee shop was already established, sorry. And he made it, he bought it, he switched it to Trump theme and they lost 85% of their customers immediately. I mean, what can you expect? When you do something like that, it's probably going to happen where people Some sort of drastic change to your clientele, at least. He's part of a friendship group, not a friendship group, Facebook group. And apparently there's about 700 of them of Trump supporters in Australia. And they have meetups there at his coffee shop. And he's opened up and he said that he is losing money. He's openly proud of it, that he's losing money over his coffee shop. I think my cat's a Trump supporter. He's decided to join us today. So he'll sit here and probably meow at me a lot. But yeah, so he's opened up this coffee shop and he's losing money and he's proud of it. And it's just, I don't understand it. And now something else is happening at the moment with Trump. It's as of filming the podcast, it's kind of new news. The Home Alone 2 director, the guy that directed the movie, if you haven't seen Home Alone 2, there's a cameo with Trump in it. I think he's in saying one of the Trump hotels or something like that. And Kevin, the little boy that gets lost, Trump for directions and Trump gives him directions. And now the director wants to cut it. He wants to cut that coming up from the movie. Rightfully so. It's his movie. He can do what he wants, but he's scared that he'll get deported. Now, everyone can have their own beliefs and everyone can do what they want and believe who they want politically. This isn't a political podcast. I know the colors on my logo kind of seem like it. I was saying that afterwards and a bit concerned, but I like the logos. We're going to keep it. And everyone's glad to have their own beliefs and own political thoughts. But at the moment, the tariff war, This is a Trump segment after all, so let's get political. The tariff war that is going on at the moment is absolutely hilarious. What, a 250% tariff on China? I mean, Trump, however intelligent he may be or may not be, does he realize that pretty much everything is made in China? Everything, your phone, what you're watching or listening to this right now, probably made in China. And I did the research myself. And I worked out why this was happening because Trump's upping them and then China's upping them. Trump's upping them and China's upping them. It's because Xi Jinping is a Gemini and Trump is also a Gemini. That's why. This isn't going to stop. It's two Geminis after each other. I'm not into the big tarot cards and stuff like that and star signs, but this makes sense. Maybe I should start believing a little bit more because they're both Geminis and this isn't getting any better. Now, something else that is made in China, apart from smartphones and literally everything, are disposable vapes. Now, this is going to lead me to our next segment. I want to talk about the technology that is currently happening in vapes. There is a technological boom. It's the industrial revolution of vapes. Little robot cocks, what I like to call them. Have you seen those phone vapes? It is a full-blown smartphone inside a vape. I just want to like... Sorry, I can't talk right now. And it's crazy to me because it took us over 25 years to get from like the first mobile phone to the first smartphone. Those big chunky phones to a little iPhone. And it's taken us, what, three years to go from a regular vape to a smartphone vape. And I've seen one of these in person. And it had like a little animation on the front. The bloke loved it. It had a little flaming skull on the front of the vape, which is honestly kind of cool. But still... Why? Why? And that's leading to me to the next thing. The Tamagotchi vapes. You've probably heard of that. If you haven't, you know what Tamagotchi is. Those little Japanese games that used to be at a cavern, like a key ring. And you had to feed it and you had to give it water and you had to let it survive. And some students over, I think in the US, they created a Tamagotchi vape. But every time you hit the vape, that was the food or that was the water. And hitting the vape led it to survive. And if you didn't hit your vape, The Tamagotchi died. Which is honestly... It's sad as... You want your little robot pet to stay alive... You have to hit your vape. And originally... I did a little bit more digging into this and... It turns out that originally... It wasn't just... To kill it. Like if you didn't hit your vape... It was going to die. It was originally that if you hit your vape... The Tamagotchi would die. Which... honestly wouldn't have had the same cultural impact because the thought that you're going to kill this innocent little electronic creature if you're not hitting your vape, it's going to make you hit it more and more and more. And I think these guys single-handedly, if Big Tobacco were making vapes, they would be the number one marketers for them. I did a little bit of more research and I was looking into more vapes and I found one more that was questionable, interesting. It was a Minion, a Minion vape, shaped like Kevin the Minion. I mean, if you're listening... Sorry. If you're watching, I'm going to insert a photo right there. Yes, I don't know why you would want to be sucking on a minion's head, but some people do. A lot of what this has been so far is just me rambling. Because it's what I do, and it's what I do best. I ramble. I'm a rambler. And something else that I want to ramble about is a mum who used her dead son's sperm to have a baby... With a surrogate mother, but it doesn't matter. She used her son, who had passed away three years previously, to have a baby. And she's not telling the kid where she came from. Now, the son had a pretty horrific death, to say the least. It was cancer. It was a pretty aggressive form of cancer, which is very sad. And his last wish was to have a kid. But I don't think the mum realised that when he wanted to have a kid, it wasn't like, I want to have a kid and not know them. It was like, I want to have a kid. I want to be a dad. I want to raise the kid. Not yet. Wait three years and then unfreeze my cum and give me a baby. Now, I don't know if excrement has a expiry date on it, but it just sounds kind of grim. Unfreezing it. putting in a surrogate mother and asking her to have the baby for you and now the kid's like i think three now and the grandma says that she'll tell her eventually the little girl eventually where her dad is and what happened but i don't know and it got me thinking about the ethics of using dead people's spunk to have a baby with because it's happened multiple times and now there's this thing called posthumous sperm retrieval which sounds interesting to say the least but it's When someone passes away, you can still collect their sperm. Sounds weird to me. It sounds like something they would do at a zoo. You know how when horses used to break their legs, they'd just shoot them, like after a race? It sounds like a similar thing that they would do to them. Like if the horse dies, you... Because why? Why? Who's giving consent to that? I, for one, wouldn't. Mum and dad, if you're listening, please don't be. I don't want you listening to this. But mum and dad, if you're listening, don't do that. please. And something else that I found really interesting is the partner of the person can have that happen. It can, they can choose to do that or not. And the whole idea of having a baby after you're dead is scary enough as it is. It happens, but having a baby that you didn't even know about after you're dead, that's, um, Pretty scary. Now, I've been talking so much about sperm that even Bonnie Blue would have had enough by now. I mean, talking about Bonnie Blue, I've got a bone to pick with essays. You write school, you're writing an essay or a paper or whatever you're doing. What's the go with conclusions? Conclusions, to me, are like aftercare for an essay. I'm sorry that you can't read it all or you can't sum it up. It's the same thing. I'm sorry, but you're a bunch of words. No aftercare for you. I don't know if that's a fair representation to make. I don't know if anything I've said today has been a fair representation. But I wanted to come here. I wanted to ramble a little bit. I think I've done that, honestly, quite well. I don't know how long this podcast is going to be. I think it's going to be pretty short. What's this? 15 minutes? It's going to be probably a pretty short podcast. But it's episode one. They always say that episode one is the worst podcast. And I know this is going to be an absolute train wreck, to say the least. And I've recorded this... I think three times now, all the way through, and I've said the same points three times all the way through, and I think it's getting worse, so I'm going to leave it here today, you guys, I'm sorry, you're not getting any aftercare today, but we're going to leave it here, see what I think, I'm going to edit it, maybe publish it, who knows, if this goes up, I'm sorry, I want to see, I want to apologize to you guys, because Let's Cancel Harry.